Congratulations, your loved one has become a cop. It’s an amazing profession where he/she can truly make a difference in people’s lives.
Most of us love every minute of every day and it’s a vocation. Others loathe every second and it’s just a job. Here is a short list of how life will now change for all of you.
1. At parties and BBQs, your loved one will lose their personal identity.
They are no longer introduced as Dan or Susan. It becomes, this is my friend [insert name here]. He’s a cop. Plumbers, teachers, graphic designers, and chefs will all be introduced without mention of what they do for a living. Cops are always introduced as cops.
2. Your loved one will speak differently after becoming a cop.
They no longer “get out of a car.” Instead they “alight from a motor vehicle.” They do not “carry a nightstick.” They instead “utilize their service batons”. They don’t “turn on a flashlight.” They “illuminate the area.” They do not “throw stun grenades during SWAT raids.” Instead they “deploy distraction devices.” A vehicle is no longer a “car.” It’s a “cruiser.” They don’t “pull a gun.” They “draw their service weapon.” I could go on.
3. Weekends no longer include Saturdays and Sundays.
You often work a four-and-two schedule, getting an actual Saturday and Sunday off once every six weeks. That is of course if you are not ordered for overtime on your day off, as often happens.
4. Holidays will now have different meanings.
While the whole world is enjoying a day off, crime and trouble are open for business 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. You can’t stay home with the kids on Christmas morning while they play with their presents. On New Year’s Eve if you are not scheduled to work, you most likely will be ordered to work.
5. Your loved one’s appearance will change.
All the T-shirts and golf shirts they wear will soon have badges, emblems, or specialized unit insignias displayed on them. Once they get assigned to the drug unit they will start to grow their hair long and grow out their goatee or full beard. (As if every drug-involved person has facial hair.) Every rookie cop would give his right arm to get the chance to wear the uniform. Then most would give their left arm for the chance to get out of uniform. (But it’s tough to be a cop with no arms.)
6. Get ready for your loved one to laugh at the weirdest things and during the most inconvenient times… often to keep from crying.
After exposure to the evil in this world, little things such as sights, sounds, and smells can trigger bad memories, cause anxiety, and change moods. It’s nothing against you, but if they admitted that these things bothered them, then they would be human. But we didn’t hire them to be human. They were hired to be cops. Humans have spontaneous human reactions and make mistakes. Cops can’t afford to, and aren’t allowed to.
7. Your loved one will make a whole lot of new friends.
They will have friends from the academy, their district, the other 20 districts, the drug unit, vice unit, detectives, homicide, SWAT, K-9, the State Police, and the federal agencies. One thing is for sure, their friends will all be cops. They will golf with cops, drink with cops, debate politics and current events with cops, go on vacation with cops, and so on. And when they are not WITH cops, they will be talking about cops. God forbid you watch a cop show with them and someone on screen isn’t doing it his or her way. You’ll be sure to hear about it. If left unchecked their entire world will consist of cops (Please ensure it doesn’t happen. Having healthy friendships outside of work keeps officers more grounded and healthy, and relationships intact.)
8. Your loved one will look at the world differently.
Often when dealing with those committing crimes all day, and constantly being lied to, can change their view of the world. We are so used to interrogating people who constantly lie to us. If not careful, cops can treat those we love as suspects.
9. Your loved one will lose their ability to have an opinion…more accurately, their opinion won’t be allowed.
Everyone has freedom of speech, except police officers. You have a right to speak freely, you just don’t have a right to be a cop. I.e.: A staunch Irish Catholic can agree with the Catholic Church and be anti-abortion. They however, must stand and be ready to risk their own life to protect the rights of pro-life individuals to freely express themselves. There is no conduct unbecoming a carpenter, but there is conduct unbecoming a cop. Off-duty behavior can impact your job.
10. Your loved one will get very frustrated when the public and the media spread the message that cops don’t care.
For the most part, cops work hard, believe they can make a difference, and will put the job’s needs over theirs and their family’s needs. They will sacrifice time with family to keep others safe and will occupy their off-duty hours with issues from the job.
Thank you for allowing your loved one to serve. It’s tough being a cop, but it’s even tougher being a cop’s family member. Especially these days!
